I read the following link:
I thought finally someone has put it into simple language. So many people think that love is the hormonal feelings that are so present at the beginning of a relationship. When they are gone, they say they are out of love.
It is those hormonal feelings that can get us into trouble. Those feelings do not let us see how “wrong” that person can be for us. We tend to bond with people who have similar traumas to us and only realize years later that what drew us together was not necessarily “love”. So what is love?
My father-in-law said it best. He told me this when I was in my 20’s and thinking that I was so in love. Thank goodness his words have stayed with me.
He said and I will translate, “Love is when you get up in the morning and you have a difficult time getting out of bed because the joints are stiff and you nudge each other out of bed. Love is when your loved one knows that you forget and so lines up all your pills in such a way that you do not forget. Love is when you are comfortable sitting down together without “needing” to share a word. Love is when you are comfortable sitting together and open to listening to every word because it is important for the other.”
At the time, I listened respectfully, today I understand.
Check out this link to the 5 love languages and you can see that there are so many ways to say “I love you”….click here
Of course I am not advocating staying in a loveless marriage and I am certainly not advocating staying in an abusive relationship. In fact, I will get on my high horse on what is abuse….what is violence…so many take certain things they do or say as innocent where in fact, it causes great damage.